December 14, 2024

Yesterday, I couldn't help but grimace

As I climbed aboard to the mocking strains

Of "I Fought The Law"

Through my headphones in my unfinished basement.

How did I get here? I ask,

Enslaved by the machine invented

To help increase the results of labor.

Hadn't I recently retired

To escape that daily grind?

Why now was I seeking a 19th century

Device for punishment as means

For supposed self-improvement?

In such isolated acts,

Embodiment of achievements

That take us nowhere,

We are anti-social, robotic creatures

Tuned into our favorite audio/visual distraction,

Even in gyms and exercise rooms

Across this crippling country,

Where we have chosen the treadmill

(Or his hipper electronic mates)

As a poor replacement for the rumor mill

Around the water cooler,

With ever the opportunity to debate

Israel and Hamas,

Russia and Ukraine,

Or, Hell, Michigan, Ohio State.

What have we lost

To these machines of good health?

I'd stick around to bore you

With my pedantic answer to that question,

But today has reached 44

With no snow or rain.

I'm off to actually get somewhere

With my 75 minutes of walking,

Maybe even tip my hat

To my Trump-loving neighbor

With his "Don't Tread On Me" banner,

Remind him to watch his step

As he struggles to get ahead.