August 9, 2020

{An actual transcript}

You're listening to WIAP, the station that's all pandemic, all the time. We hope you enjoyed our journey back in time to the summer of love, the hippy, dippy, remembrance of "Extraordinary Times."  Before we take you back to our regularly scheduled program, let us remind you that WIAP is made possible by listeners like you. Be a corporate (rock) sponsor and send in your donation today.

We now resume our regularly scheduled program, "American Top 40," already in progress.

Announcer: Welcome back to "American Top 40."' I'm your host, Spacey Spacum. Now we are up to our long-distance dedication, which will take us back to 1984.  How nice! 1984 had so many different things going on musically. Anyway, this dedication comes from Dave in Michigan, who writes, "would you dedicate The Alarm's 'Where Were You Hiding When The Storm Broke' . . ."  Wait, hold it, hold it, stop the tape.

Engineer: What's the problem, Spacey?

Spacey: What are we doing here?  No one knows this song.  The point of a long distance dedication is to make the audience connect with a song from the past by using some touching narrative.  Who the hell remembers "Why were you hiding as the storm broke?"

Producer: "Where Were You Hiding When The Storm Broke," Spacey! We talked about this at the pre-production meeting.  You might want to attend those.

Spacey: Crimminy, Carl, I have been doing this show for 8 decades, I can do it in my sleep. It's not Brain Salad Surgery.

Producer: Very funny, Spacey, but at the pre-production meeting, all of us agreed that Dave's dedication is apropos. So just read your damn lines.

Spacey: Fine, but listeners are going to turn us off. They'll probably go listen to that jerk Limbaugh.

Producer: Trust us, Spacey.  Miguel, start the tape again. We'll begin with the "now we are up to" part of the script.

Spacey: Now we are up to our long-distance dedication, which will take us back to 1984.  How nice! 1984 had so many different things going on musically. Anyway, this dedication comes from Dave in Michigan, who writes, "would you dedicate The Alarm's 'Where Were You Hiding When The Storm Broke' to all the people who sit by and do nothing and then complain?"  Really? Come on guys? This is our dedication?

Producer: Stop tape, Miguel. What's the problem, Spacey?

Spacey: This is a negative dedication. We don't do those. This part of the show is supposed to be uplifting, you know, young love, nostalgia, memorials to parents, brothers, dogs, hamsters lost. Remember that time I cried because of the dead dog!  Peabody Gold!

Producer: What the hell?  Are you on something, Spacey?  Anyway, pre-Production meetings, Spacey.  All of this already hashed through. Dave from Michigan has got a point. Just read the whole thing.  Miguel, start tape. Start, right after the request is articulated by our star."

Spacey: "The lyrics are so perfect," writes Dave. "Each man kills the thing he loves/for better or worse." Ha! Well, you're killing the thing I love, Carl.

Producer: Miguel, tape! That's it, Spacey. Just do your freaking job or find a place where you can do what you want. Pretty sure you won't find that in radio today.  It ain't like it used to be, Spacey. Now what is it?  Are you going to read the script without comment or is Miguel going to become a star today?

Miguel: Really?

Producer: Hush, Miguel, not now. You know how the FCC feels about these things.

Casey: Fine, roll tape, Miguel. I'll take it from the "better or worse" line.

Casey: "People are killing the things they love, left and right," Dave goes on to say in his dedication. "Everyone is so principled or crippled by irrational fear that they have become inflexible. There is a reason these lines were penned by The Alarm. It's a warning to us."  Honestly? Sheesh!

Producer: Just keep rolling, Miguel. We'll edit his asides out later.

Casey: Dave asks us to hold these people accountable by remembering Mike Peters' lines "They say all things come in threes/here comes the third degree/where were you hiding when the storm broke?" Dave ends his long-distance dedication with a reminder that when Peters' sings "the truth is the truth/or the truth is surely a lie/get back in your shelter/if you can't come down off your fence," the fence should probably be replaced by "wall."  Very clever, Dave from Michigan.  Facebook walls and border walls. So, Dave from Michigan, here you go, you got us to sound your Alarm. Ladies and Gentlemen, "where were you hiding when the storm broke?"

Song plays.

Casey: You know, guys, this song isn't that bad.  Nice call and response with the backing vocals.  Gunfire type drums.  And of course if you look at that band, you got all that great hair . . . and a lot of not so great hair.  That Peters' dude is really hairy.

Producer: I have to admit, Casey, I didn't expect you to come around. Are you actually doing research? What happened?

Casey: Oh, that's not me. Dave from Michigan handwrote this on the back of the envelope.

Producer: A wordy dude that Dave from Michigan.

"Where Were You Hiding When The Storm Broke." The Alarm. Declaration. 1984. Link here.

Day 104: James "Extraordinary Times."

Day 106: The 5th Dimension "Aquarius/Let The Sun Shine In."->

See complete list here.