December 20, 2021

Much ado has been made over the last few days of the college professor who hid $50 on campus with clues left in his syllabus that would lead students to it. None of his students found it or were able to claim it.  Because it's what we do, academics all over the world have jumped on the "students-never-read-the-syllabus" bandwagon. 

The poor syllabus is academia's version of the "licensing agreement," the never-ending terms of conditions, in fine print, that students theoretically sign off every time they take a class. With the regulations that have come from Departments of Education, national or state, along with transparency expectations to protect faculty and colleges, the syllabus has evolved from a 3-4 page document with a course schedule and some contact information to dozens of pages with information about accommodations, academic dishonesty, withdrawals, attendance, course outcomes, grading scales, teaching methods, inclusivity, trigger warnings, campus learning support services, consent to record, Title IX, and more. 

Is it a wonder no one is reading them?  We didn't read them when they were handed out to us in hard copies, now most faculty post them through the Learning Management System and still somehow expect students to read electronic versions thoroughly. It wasn't that long ago that it was recommended that faculty go through the syllabus in detail on the first day, information-dumping on those students while they were a captive audience.  For a full-time student, that was a lot of time hearing the same language about plagiarism. Such a first day activity is now seen as a worst practice and sacrificed for lesson plans that engage students more directly. 

At a time when everyone worries about a War on Christmas, I speak out about the War on Syllabi.

The Twelve Days Of Class

On the first day of class

My teacher sent to us

A 33-page syllabus.

On the second day of class

My teacher sent to us

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the third day of class

My teacher sent to us

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the fourth day of class

My teacher sent to us

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus,

On the fifth day of class

My teacher sent to us

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the sixth day of class

My teacher sent to us

Six academic policies,

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the seventh day of class

My teacher sent to us

Seven course assessments,

Six academic policies,

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the eighth day of class

My teacher sent to us

Eight course disclaimers,

Seven course assessments,

Six academic policies,

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the ninth day of class

My teacher sent to us

Nine required materials,

Eight course disclaimers,

Seven course assessments,

Six academic policies,

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the tenth day of class

My teacher sent to us

Ten learning outcomes,

Nine required materials,

Eight course disclaimers,

Seven course assessments,

Six academic policies,

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the eleventh day of class

My teacher sent to us

Eleven behavioral expectations,

Ten learning outcomes,

Nine required materials,

Eight course disclaimers,

Seven course assessments,

Six academic policies,

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.

On the twelfth day of class

My teacher sent to us

Twelve reasons to drop,

Eleven behavioral expectations,

Ten learning outcomes,

Nine required materials,

Eight course disclaimers,

Seven course assessments,

Six academic policies,

Five hidden clues (buried in),

Four ways to contact her,

Three excused absences,

Two participation points

From reading the 33-page syllabus.