May 31, 2016

Some blogs write themselves.  That's the case today.  I will be surprised if the following takes me more than 10 minutes.

The headline from UPI news:  Endangered Snake Spotted On Community College Campus.

First off, unless you live in Holyoke, Massachusetts, you don't really need to worry. That may still be too close for my comfort -- Mark Carter's disgust of snakes in It's All Academic is copied directly from me. Nevertheless, it is far enough away from Dowagiac, Michigan, to allow me to channel the secondary headlines that write themselves:

He was just looking for his new office in the administration building.

A minority hire, for sure.

His math S.A.T. scores kept him out of the state universities.

He's disappointed that he can only get a paralegal degree.

He was being called to a meeting by the Title IX officer.

It's not only programs that are constricted here.

Football coach to be fired for encouraging him to transfer here.

Students protest.  Local politicians grandstand.

Admission reps race to get him signed up for classes.

College can't count him as a persister since he hibernated through Winter semester.