Wanted: No Tell Lover

Job Posted: November 2, 2022

Job Details:

Chicago, not the City of, and formerly the Chicago Transit Authority, seeks a No Tell Lover for indiscreet affairs. This position is full-time. Applicants need to be able to work 7 nights or days a week. The position is paid hourly with no overtime because after all every minute is an hour, every day's a lonely lifetime. The ideal candidate must be willing to travel the world for a rendezvous every night in a different place.

The position holds an important transitional role in Chicago, LLC. While most organizations expand, Chicago has contracted fully from the breadth of holdings that made up The Chicago Transit Authority. The transit has been shut down and all sense of authority has been abrogated in the pursuit of soft rock pop hits. While the "No Tell Lover" will appear on the same vinyl sheets as "Alive Again," the latter will represent that last of a truly hot street, while our No Tell Lover will foresee harder times, as in Hard Habits to Break and finding it Hard To Say I'm Sorry. The No Tell Lover hire will leave everyone in the organization murmuring "You Are The Inspiration" and will anticipate times when Chicago will Look Away from the past that made them CTA.

Knowledge, Skills and Abilities:

Discreetness

Pretty Smile

Lovely Face

Warm Breeze

Tenderness

Pay:

Royalties.  Just watch them stream in.

Benefits:

While little job advancement, a lot of hanging out with the brass.

Stellar retirement package, after all this time can't last forever.

Residuals, residuals, residuals.

To apply:

Submit a resume, cover letter and the names of 3 references who can confirm that you are a no tell lover through our PopstarsGoneSoft application system.

Applications will be reviewed upon submission. Candidates not selected will not be informed of their job status, as only befitting those in the No Tell Lover line of work.

Chicago LLC is an equal opportunity employer even if a No Tell Lover is later scorned because "If She Had Only Been Faithful." Chicago reserves the right to assign Roman Numerals to all employees' records.

Chicago. "No Tell Lover." Hot Streets. Columbia, 1978.  Link here.

Day 196: They Might Be Giants "How Can I Sing Like A Girl"

Day 198: Depeche Mode "Policy Of Truth"

See complete list Here